I have just finished reading a book called, How Big Is Your God?: The Freedom to Experience the Divine by Paul Coutinho.
I have two words… Life. Changing.
A couple weeks ago, Carlos and I were sitting in the living room talking. The boys were asleep, the house was dark and silent. Somehow we got onto the topic of religion.
In the darkness I felt safe. I couldn’t see Carlos’ eyes on me and I blurted out in a loud whisper, “How do you know there really is a God?”
The words shocked me and I began to cry, because I knew that this was a question I silently ask myself every day. It was a secret I felt I couldn’t share with anyone. If I share it with unbelievers, then what kind of example am I? And if I share it with believers they may be judgmental, or if they’re weak in faith as I am, I may take them down with me.
Carlos asked me why it made me cry and I said something that I never wanted to acknowledge. I was crying out of fear. If I don’t believe in God, what does this mean for me? My Baptist upbringing had taught me about a vindictive, angry God who punishes sinners by sending them to a fiery hell for eternity. This was the God I could not understand, could not relate to, and felt, I couldn’t believe in. This was a God of wrath, a monster, really.
This book helped me to realize, among other things, that this is a very small God. We have limited God with this perspective. God is so much greater than that – So much greater.
If you seriously want to deepen your relationship with God and live a happier more fulfilling life, you must read this book. It doesn’t matter what religion you are. There are some parts of the book that speak directly about Christianity, but this is for anyone. I will warn you, this book is a challenge. It will make you think and it will open up new doors in your heart and mind that you didn’t even know existed. After reading it, I don’t think I’ll ever be quite the same.